Meditation Games Diary: 1/2/19

Today’s game was developed by Adriel Wallick and was a great game about the consequences of working too hard, and life events that derail your feelings of happiness. It also reminded me of having pneumothorax with its gameplay, which relies on the mechanic of growing a circle by holding the spacebar in small intervals, as the circle begins to shrink when you hold spacebar for too long. During the time the spacebar is pressed, the circle gradually turns red until it reaches a point where it shrinks to its original small size. This represents the setbacks in life and the bittersweet holiday season.

In the last two weeks of December, I decided to start working on my GOTY series, and this was right after I completed my college term, and it was at a time where I was spending time with family. I worked myself too hard at first, and promised that my GOTY articles would release daily for the last ten days of December. This was a goal that I could not complete, and it haunted me for the end of the year. I have been working here since August, but the deadlines I make for myself always seem to be pushed back.

I should know by now that it isn’t a good idea to set unrealistic expectations for myself, but here I am, starting a series of articles that will give me 365 articles to write not including my various other articles and pitches. I am setting myself up for disappointment, and it is great to know that now so that I can adjust my schedule to make sure that I never fall behind on my work. I will make sure to not push myself too hard and be completely transparent if something occurs that affects the release of my articles.

Wallick’s game also showed me how quickly life can set you back. When you feel like you are doing great and can’t be harmed by anything life throws at you, life can toss a bus full of problems your way and ruin everything. The strong becomes the weak, the immortal becomes the vulnerable. There have certainly been times where I have been destroyed by a life event, turning my joyous week into one that will be etched in my mind forever for the saddest of reasons.

I felt some sort of anxiety while playing it, though. The rhythm of making the circle grow before getting red and damaging your progress was shockingly similar to sensations in my chest that I felt when breathing when I had pneumothorax. Each breath had to be light, and anything more would lead to extreme pain, so my breathing was completely messed up when I had it. The gameplay had me breathing with the circle expanding, and seeing it turn red reminded me of how intense the pain was, and how it felt like my lungs were going to pop.

Wallick’s game worked extremely well with the theme of Meditations. It was small, simple to learn, and related to various topics. Whether it was a teaching of how you shouldn’t work yourself to death, or a dark reminder about your past mistakes or sad times, Wallick’s game holds a lot of value for how short it is. Its design uses color signals to guide you which was great. This is what I was expecting out of Meditations, and I am very excited about the future of the project.

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